I've been kidnapped!!
It's true.. to watch party 2, go to http://take180.com/ijustine
ijustine
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Errand Feasibility Study - Marc Rides Donkey to do Errands
Studying errands is no small task. Everyday people are faced with the necessary errands - grocery lists need to be checked, tires need more pressure, credit cards need to be paid, new phones need to be acquired, broken things need to be fixed, dogs need their vitamins, sailboats need a specific polish, gifts need to be purchased, and everyone needs new underwear.
Common problems that can occur while fulfilling errands include: loneliness and alienation, boredom, impatience, anxiety, frustration, lethargy, hunger, flatulence, humming a Neil Diamond song, encountering stinky children, head bumps, and thoughtlessness.
In an effort to solve some of the aforementioned problems and create new and exciting ways of running errands, I have designed a two-part feasibility study:
Phase I: Running errands with others
Phase II: Running errands on a pack mule
Phase I: I run errands with strangers. I offer advice on which brand of cereal to buy, help folks fold laundry, determine the best quote on auto body repair. Phase II: I do the same thing as Phase I, but now I’m on a donkey.
My studies determine that, if one desires to be spiritually fullfilled, errands need to be more than just a menial task. This can be achieved in many ways: go on your errands with another person, or in a group, wear some silly shades and a wig while doing your errands, walk backwards through the store, carry a really big boom box playing your favorite music, dress-up in a tux to go to Walgreens, if you don’t take the bus, take the bus to do your errands. Go out and start an errand support group in your neighborhood or initiate group bill-paying sessions. The possibilities to make errands more communal and more appealing are endless.
How to make a TP Tornado!
This is sort of something I stumbled upon by accident while waiting for a phone call. It is very easy to execute and brings one much pleasure. All you need is a ceiling fan and a roll of toilet paper.
Here is the easy-to-follow 10-step process for creating a TP Tornado for yourself:
2) Unravel about three or four feet of the TP.
3) Give it a throw up in the air so it goes over TWO of the fan blades (if it goes over just one blade, gently pull it off and try again). This the most crucial step.
4) Once you have the TP roll over the TWO fan blades, then unroll the rest of it. You can throw it around a bit more if it brings you pleasure. Whatever you do, don't break the stream - REMEMBER ONE SOLID STRIP OF TP!
5) Once all of the TP is unrolled on the floor, remove the cardboard roll, and make sure the toilet paper isn't too tangled up.
6) Start the ceiling fan on medium to medium high speed and watch the fun began!
7) As the toilet paper twists up like a tornado, help it ravel up a bit by feeding it some of the toilet paper on the floor.
8) Once the TP tornado has sucked up almost all of the TP, turn off the fan.
9) Run back to the tornado. As the fan slows down, gently lift up the main TP twist (as pictured) to alleviate some of the stress at the top. Do this until the fan stops completely.
10) Slowly release your grip and step back to enjoy your personal TP Tornado!!Show your friends and loved ones. Take a picture and send it to me. I'd love to post a collection of TP tornados from around the world.Yes, the tornado is technically up side down but who really cares?
POOPSHOES!!!!
Poopshoes are your ticket to confident pooping. Just watch and see for yourself. If you are interested in placing an order, just let me know and we'll work something out!
Michael Phelps, animated gif style (hilarious)
I try to read almost every post that gets posted to Posterous. It's a tall order, but along the way I get to see some pretty awesome stuff. Stuff like this... LOL.
Hat tip to von_brandis
In a vehicle
Hello. I am typing in a car. It's moving really fast. There are other cars too. We are on the road. There are lines on the road. They are there to let us know if we can pass other cars or not and to divide the road into multiple lanes.
I am sitting in a seat. I always wear my seatbelt because it is safe. You should always wear your seat belt. If you are in a car and if you are on a motocycle you should also wear a helmet. If you are in a car and you are wearing your helmet that is okay too.
Bicycle saftey is also very important but I do not care about bikes so that is that but I hear that you should wear spandex so you can go really fast on your bike.
Thank you and have a nice day.
<3
