Like many parents, my mom had some interesting sayings that she used while I was growing up, and since her passing in 2001, I miss hearing them. One of her common phrases was "stop coming and come on." Since the phrase probably makes little sense to anyone outside of the world of my siblings, I will explain it.
When we were younger, living at home, and had chores to do or our mom wanted to speak with us, she would call out our names. Like most children, we did not want to be disturbed from our intricate playtime rituals, including building faux cities, states and a government with our teddy bears and dolls. (My older sister even gave it a name--The Delesia States). However, our mom would become frustrated with us when we would reply, "I'm coming!" The irony was that although we replied, we did not move an inch and kept on playing as if she was not expecting us. She would then reply in her stern voice, "stop coming and come on!" As adults, my siblings (2 brothers and 5 sisters) chuckle about this, especially when reminiscing about the happiest times and memories involving our mom. But as children, we knew that the "stop coming and come on" phrase meant that a spanking could possibly be the next phase.
I take that statement to heart though and try to apply it to my life. When I think the phrase of "stop coming and come on," I think of the idea that it's better to get moving on something instead of just wondering/talking about it. It's easy for me to say that I will do something or want to do something and much more challenging to actually do it. I think the biggest fear for most people when attempting to do something is a fear of failure. You can definitely fail or succeed when trying to accomplish something. You definitely won't succeed if you never try. Churchill is quoted with the statement "courage is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm." If that is the case, I have not always been courageous. I hate to make mistakes and I especially hate failing at something. I have had to change my view of success and failure to be more inclusive of the experience itself, instead of simply the end result. Now I feel successful when I try something difficult and overcome what may appear to be insurmountable obstacles while enjoying the experience of learning, instead of simply hoping that whatever I attempt has the exact result that I think it should have. Often times, valuable lessons are learned along the way, and that includes failures. Now I try to learn from each good and bad thing. Also, I do not think that learning can only occur when bad things happen. Sometimes, lessons are missed when good things happen since people tend to dwell on the bad. I am not completely courageous yet; I cannot state that I feel complete enthusiasm with every mistake that I make. However, I do learn and learning is always valuable, whether painful or pleasurable. To me, success isn't one ultimate goal at the "end" of the road, but the feeling of being able to learn and enjoy the journey. Very challenging. Definitely worth it.
The pleasure is in the pursuit; the joy is in the journey. The dream isn't the destination, instead, the aspiration is for the adventure.
